Konstantin: You think [Villanelle] loves you? Then make her hate you. Hate is something she understands. It's manageable. Look at what happens to the peope she loves. She loves you to death. Look at Anna, Nadia, and look at me.
Villanelle: It's my dad's fiftieth birthday. I want to get him something special. I've been saving up. This [tie] is perfect. Where's it from?
Greg Richardson: Hermès.
Villanelle: No, it's not. It's a fake.
Nico: What's happening?
Eve: I made you breakfast.
Nico: What did you do? Did you murder someone?
Eve: No! I just thought it would be nice.
Nico: Thank you. I'm sorry. This looks delicious. What is it?
Eve: An omelette.
Nico: If you wanted to show your devotion, you could just do the easy thing.
Eve: No, I gotta go to work. Later, I promise.
Nico: I'll just masturbate onto this omelette then, I guess.
Eve: Okay! Love you!
Villanelle: Guess how many semen stains are on the bed? Seven - not including the one on the pillow.
Jemma: We were starting to tease Nico about his imaginary wife.
Nico: She's an astronaut.
Jemma: Like an astronaut Playboy model.
Eve: She sounds better than your actual wife.
Nico: Oh, she is.
Villanelle: Do you think [Nico] likes you too?
Jemma: Dunno. Sometimes, maybe.
Villanelle: Maybe? He just needs a little push. Squirt your perfume in his room so it always smells like you. Flatter him. Make him doubt hs wife.
Jemma: Sounds a bit manipulative.
Villanelle: It is. That's why it works. Or you can do nothing and die alone. Do you have cats?
Jemma: I have a cat, yes.
Villanelle: Yeah, maybe you should just get another one.
Eve: Omigawd, Pythagoras - he's the sexiest.
Nico: I'm more of a Newton man myself. You could run your fingers through that hair all day.
Villanelle: This is a terrible hug.
Konstantin: Then maybe you shouldn't have shot me.
Villanelle: You're not still mad about that? I aimed to make sure I didn't kill you.
Konstantin: No, you didn't. You aimed at my heart.
Villanelle: Yeah, I did. Nice and clean, just like you taught me. I'm sorry.
Konstantin: You know how Raymond gets paid?
Villanelle: Ugly jackets?
Carolyn: I don't normally get angry, Eve. It just makes me sleepy so you'll just have to imagine that I sound rather angry when I saw this - never ever go behind my back again, ever. You are ny no means the only person I work with but you take up a disproportionate amount of my time, and my time is very valuable to me. I have hobbies.